by Melinda Ferguson The time after a baby arrives is one of enormous change for the entire family. Relationships shift, priorities shift, many aspects of daily life change, and there is much to learn about the care and feeding of a new little person. All of these transitions happen regardless of whether someone gave birth themselves, just by the nature of bringing a…
Tag: relationships
The baby is amazing…but intimacy sucks.
by Zach Brittle As a couples therapist, I see a ton of different kinds of relationship issues. This week, a couple came into my office asking for help because they’d just had a baby. They related that the baby was like a grenade. In this case it was was a “he”. And “he” exploded onto the family scene and disrupted…
Having a baby? Here’s why you’re likely to get divorced soon
by Zach Brittle You know that statistic that 50% of all marriages end in divorce? It’s actually a myth. The good news is that the actual number isn’t quite that high. In fact, sociologists have been debating it for some time and most agree that the actual number is somewhere between 25% and 40%. I realize that’s a huge range…
Seattle Dadvocate: Interview with Chris Casazza
Chris will present Top Survival Tips for New Dads this Wednesday, September 16 at the PEPS for Dads event at Lantern Brewing. $10 or pay what you can. Food and drink available for purchase on site. Register at http://pepsfordads.brownpapertickets.com/. This article is an excerpt of a longer piece published by Perinatal Support Washington, the new name of Postpartum Support International of Washington…
Dads Taking Care of their Families & Themselves
PEPS asked me, “What advice do you have for dads in terms of “self care” after the baby comes?” What a tricky question. I don’t mind telling you…I got a vasectomy a few weeks ago. As far as major medical procedures go, it was actually pretty simple. I was in and out of my appointment in about 20 minutes. But…
How do we have the sex talk at a PEPS Group?
Many parents are thinking about intimacy after baby and that’s great. In a PEPS Group, parents may find it a safe place to talk about it. Some may be wondering, just like with baby’s sleep patterns, “are other parents experiencing the same things we are?” “Are things ever going to return to ‘normal’?”
Cheers – to Kicking Ourselves Out of the House
One thing I’ve learned through my own experience as a parent, and from the dozens of parents I’ve gotten to know through the PEPS groups I’ve been a part of – is everyone needs to feel connected, first and foremost, to their partner. You are the foundation of your family, and when you’re good, your kids are likely to be good, too. Kids just pick up on this sort of thing.
Daddy role shift – setting new expectations after baby arrives
Setting some expectations can ward off simmering resentments and give you a sense of fortitude even in spite of all the new changes having a baby involves.
“It’s not you”
I’ll never forget the quote of a dear friend who enlightened me on the experience of new fathers. He said, “I was prepared to be a father, but I was not prepared to be married to a mother”.